Thursday, April 5, 2012

something that annoys me

I was reading replys in all the various posts about the line by Ji Firepaw. I spent rather a long time reading. I didn't like the comment, I actually find it immensely annoying that women are often reduced to  their appearance as being what is important about them.

I have two kids a son and a daughter, I remember when my son was very young he was ethereally pretty, people would come up to us and exclaim " what a beautiful little girl! She will break hearts" occasionally ( strangers, not like I will ever see them again and it was annoying to always correct them, this happened a lot) we would say he's a boy, they would fret and apologise and say " he must be very clever". the would also tell us to cut his hair, but he liked it long and we didn't really feel it was important. My daughter on the other hand was a bit less pretty, she's lovely now , but she really looked like her dad as a toddler and we'd cut her hair short as she hated to sit to have it brushed. Relatives would lament how unfair it was  her brother got the great looks. Because you know all that is important for a girl is to be pretty.We her parents tried to mostly compliment her skills and ability and her  smarts, she's an amazing critical thinker and can often out debate teachers. still, what others notice is her looks, although now it's because she's cute. Although mostly they say she should smile and not look so fierce since girls should look of a pleasant temperament.

So in subtle places where you'd think it's unnecessary you'd think , these little things could be left out , a NPC could not how  smart,  cunning, agile, in tune with the elements or strong a character is say base it on their class, and not their looks.

Because it reenforces the at girls looks are all that matters about them and every day girls and women get that message  many times over , watch some commercials on the television look at the cover of a women's or teen magazine and you will see it's all about the looks. ( and people wonder why so many girls get eating disorders)

The other thing I kept seeing in comments on these article especially this one is that " the guys who play female characters who are only rarely harassed in game or not at all , it must not be a problem really. But you see it is a problem because of this, it happens, if it happens occasionally it is still too much. You see when you are a woman / girl you walk down the street and guys will yell this  stuff at you they will say how hot you are and how they want to F*ck you , even if you are 12 or even older if you are fat or ugly they will say other rubbish, because to them and many guys or I'm being charitable her guys who don't think, all that matters is you are there to look attractive and or be available to them to F*ck. they are being intimidating, and if you tell them off or ignore them some will blow up and become threatening and  insult you or call you stuck up, or make other threats. So think about this you just want to walk to the grocer for some fresh veg to cook with dinner , but some dude yells , hey beautiful, great boobs" ( yeah it's a compliment riiiight , if you think this is a compliment I feel sad you are so stupid) then if you roll your eyes or even not, they graphically yell what they want to do to you. this,  quite often for daring to go out in public as a female. You live with this most every day. you are aware how sometimes this  street harassment can turn dangerous. you are aware that to many you are just  an object they  want to use. ( and for the guys going " not me! I don't do that " great you don't but if you don't obviously I'm not talking about you)

So you go home , log into a game to relax and look the NPCs are at it too,  it's irritating and you really don't need it in game and really lecherous old dudes aren't all that funny , it's old , guys an old tired trope that needs to die.

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